Category: non-food posts

Why Not Just Let That Shit Go? Or, How Not To Be A Total Dick During A Pandemic

A bit blurry. I know. But hilarious nonetheless and a good image for today’s writing, #HeresMyButt

Stay-at-home/shelter-in-place, day one, and I have already gone out to go feed my cat.

This is the week that KWeeks and I are together; on alternating weeks, he is with his daughter. I have abandoned my kitty to stay with Khristian but go home daily to feed him wet food, love on him, remind him I will be home soon.

There were still cars on the road, but not many. There were still people walking around, but not many, and usually alone or in groups of two, close together so you can know that they live in the same household.

What there was a lot of, unusually for Hampden, was police cars. I passed five in the mile-and-a-half drive to my house. It’s not tanks down the streets, but it feels close to that.

This seems fitting, this sense of lowering doom, as this will be the last week that Khristian and I spend together for who knows how long. The perils of joint custody, I suppose, with me as the casualty.

Woe is me, right? I wonder how many other people are struggling with this and not saying anything. Divorced people who share custody of children but cannot bring themselves to be kind enough to fully disclose what happens in their houses, placing the kids, the custodial parents, and their partners at risk.

It’s situations like this that make me believe that we will not, in fact, come out any better on the other side of this. Even when it comes to endangering another person’s life -whether you like them or not – there are still people so wrapped up in their own bullshit and power struggle that they cannot see what is best. They cannot rise above their ego to consider other people.

Here’s a thought: if you are normally a total selfish dick, maybe now is the time to step back and take a look at that behavior. Maybe now is a good time to let go of your vitriolic hatred. Maybe you could stop doing things that intentionally hurt others. Maybe you could soften just a little and recognize that things could be so much easier if you just let that shit go.

So. What are you learning to let go of? What are you still clinging to? And how is that working out for you?

31 Day Social Media Fast: Day 2

In which I skip out on Instagram and Facebook for the month of March but still allow myself the internet.

Dy 2: Woke up at 4 a.m. to the intermittent chirp of a smoke detector about to shit the bed.

I am sensing a trend in this early rising. Goes hand in hand with the early eating from Day 1. Which was not necessarily bad, except I got really hungry around nine and ate a hunk of cheese and a gluten-free ciabatta. I could have eaten several ciabatta but did not because #restraint.

I have a hard time going back to sleep, even with earplugs in, a pillow over my head, and two doors between me and the noise (in The Child’s room, BTW, and she doesn’t stir at all).

I am sure as this month wears on I will alternate between longing for social media and realizing I am well shut of it, but when I wake up for good this morning, in the rainy quiet, with the cat purring on my chest and me reading out loud to him the first essay from The Book of Delights instead of automatically checking Instagram, I don’t feel the lack.

I get to yoga earlier than usual. Class is lovely, as it always is when my beautiful students show up to share their practices with me.

Later in the day I listen to other people’s children play their cello pieces, a surprisingly lovely thing, marred only by an old woman hacking and crinkling a water bottle in the quietest parts. Khristian’s daughter plays well, as do many of the others. A young man plays “Smells Like Teen Spirit” with the instructor, and it’s challenging to not sing along.

This post should feature a video of that performance, but none of my technology cooperates.

At intermission, everyone pulls their phones out. Except me. I feel mildly superior, and then remember I have 29 days left, and I have absent-mindedly chosen to keep this running commentary in the present tense – a major pet peeve of mine – and am chastened somewhat.

Two days down.

As ever, comment below if you want to make your presence known. And thanks for joining in. <3